Ever wish you had a really good girl “friend”—meaning platonic friend who could sit down with you and tell you want a woman wants when it comes to dating? Well, I’m that friend!
Here are 11 simple things women want when it comes to the guy we are dating. They aren’t really complicated, none cost money, and none are really that demanding. Try some of these and see what happens. I can’t guarantee anything, but I will say you’ll probably be pleasantly surprised at how your girl reacts!
1. Ask us out on dates. No matter how long we’ve been in the relationship, we want to be asked out on specific nights and times, way ahead of time. Everything from a romantic dinner to a casual stay at home movie night! Ask us ahead of time and be specific!
2. FOREPLAY. We want to be romanced and kissed and we want to know you love us before we sleep with you. Make us feel beautiful and adored. Turn on the charm!
3. We want you to hold our hand in public. Not all the time, just sometimes. In other words, we want to be touched, not just in bed. Scratch our backs, put your arm around us. Show affection from time to time.
4. We want you to notice things. Our new sandals or handbag, or our haircut or pedicure, or our smile. We want you to tell us we look nice when we make the effort. What that means for you is just paying a little bit more attention to details.
5. We want you to be interested in our careers. Ask about our job. Tell us you are proud when we get recognition or do something commendable.
6. Cry in front of us if you need to. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerableour arms. We want to be there for you during the times you really, really, really need us. We know it’s hard for you, but we want you to trust us. A good person doesn’t run from a man who cries, she wipes his tears and listens.
7. We love when you cook us dinner. I don’t care if it’s spaghetti and jar sauce. The thought counts.
8. LISTEN to us. Listen to our stupid stories and topics that you don’t particularly care that much about. Listen to things that are important to us and remember things.
9. Be honest with us. If you want a night out with your friends, just say it. (Any woman who gets irritated by that needs to get a clue.) If something is bothering you about us, just say it. Don’t hold it in and then harbor resentment, just tell us so we can say sorry if we owe you an apology, and so we won’t do it again if it was hurtful.
10. Laugh. Be funny. Be silly. Lighten the mood when things get entirely too serious. Girls LOVE funny guys!!
11. Love us. Just love us. We are divorced women who are fragile. We have baggage. We have vulnerability and we are insecure sometimes. Make us feel loved. Reassure us that you care for us and thatyou are committed. Love us both physically and emotionally.
I’m not saying that if you do these things every girl will fall madly in love with you and you will live happily ever. What I am trying to get across is that your relationship will improve. There will be less arguing, less disappointment from both people, less resentment. And your girlfriend will start to return all your little gestures tenfold! That’s how women are built.
Joshua Tilghman
Jackie,
So nice to see another post that let’s us men see what’s important to a woman. After divorce, we can get too caught up in ourselves and forget what a woman really wants to see to us do. I think you summed it up best in your last point…just love us. The different baggage types that women bring after a divorce sometimes make this hard for us to assess. Does she need this or that. But if we just focus on your first ten points, with most girls we’ll make them comfortable enough to figure it out! Thanks!